Freak Comics

This is from a short comic in the back of Detective Comics #451 featuring Robin the Teen Wonder.

What is it that Robin has planned for Lori? Why is he taking her deep in to the woods?
And what’s with the look on his face? He looks like a creepy redneck.

On a side note, both Lori and Robin have very thick thighs.

Twenty one years and five months ago, Star Comics (a former imprint of Marvel Comics) released Ewoks issue #2.

If you don’t know what an Ewok is, you most likely have never seen Star Wars Return of the Jedi, or any of the various Ewok movies. So for the rare few of you who don’t know, an Ewok is an annoying little bear-like critter that lives on a moon called Endor. Do to their sickening cuteness, they appeal to little children (as they were meant to).
Ewoks have stupid names like Wicket, Teebo and Kneesaa. They had their own cartoon, their own movies and their own comic, all marketed to children.
They also suck.

A long time ago when I was very young, a friend of mine gave me a few of his comic books. Among the issues happened to be Ewoks #2, and now I submit to you a review of this horrible comic book.

Ewoks in “Rites of Power”

For being a kid’s comic, the plot is surprisingly complex.
It’s princess Kneesaa’s birthday and Wicket and Teebo are on scout duty. They’re chilling out in a tree when some Zorbian Space Pirates make an appearance. They’re after the Ewok’s village which just so happens to have a Gemwood tree.

The Captain of the Space Pirates claims that an ounce of the Gemwood Tree’s wood is worth more than anything in the universe. Oh really? What about two ounces of the wood… or the whole tree for that matter?

At any rate, Teebo gets captured and the whole issue ends up being about Kneesaa’s coming of age and more importantly, proving that Women can be leaders as well. This is accomplished by the entire male Ewok tribe being captured which leaves Kneesaa to organize the Females in to a defensive militant unit.

Early on at Kneesaa’s birthday her father, chief Chirpa, declares that if anything should happen to him, his daughter will lead the people in his stead. This is met with stiff opposition from some some of the older Ewoks.

Am I missing something here? Since when do Ewoks refer to themselves as Men and Women?

The Zorbian Space Pirates eventually make it to the Ewok Village, and things get creepy.

Interspecies sexual harassment… gross!

Captain Krag is actually making innuendoes towards a female Ewok! I think he’s spent too much time up in space with his men. His thinking has become a little warped.

It’s really no wonder that Ewoks had a mere 14 issues produced in the span of two years. It was a comic target towards kids, but the writing most likely went over their heads. This just goes to prove that Ewoks are an abomination no matter where they show their disgustingly cute faces.

While traditional Super Hero comics certainly have a majority hold on the popular comic market, non-traditional comics are on the rise (Teen Dramas, Science Fiction, etc.). What is your favorite comic book genre?

Personally I like traditional super hero comics even though they’re repetitive and cheesy most of the time.
But my all time favorite comic book is the Walking Dead which is a Horror comic, and my second favorite is Fear Agent, which falls in to the Science Fiction genre.

I definitely buy more Super Hero comics than horror though, but that might come down to there being a larger selection of super hero theme comic books. That, combined with the fact that most horror comics have little to no thought put in to the plot, dialogue or overall story, makes me throw most of my cash to DC and Marvel.

So again, I ask: what is your favorite genre of comics?

I’ve taken quite a bit of heat lately for my post “The Non-Diverse Brave New World” in which I rant about people’s negative reaction to the DC teaser image.

My favorite is this post which actually picks apart my article piece by piece, and points out exactly why they think I’m an uncaring bigot.
Early on in that article, the question of why I took the defensive for DC is posed.

So now it’s come down to this. An article from me explaining why I wrote such a harsh article in defense of the DC Comics teaser image.

First off, my original article was a response to a post which stated the following:

“Yes, there are several women in this shot, but not one person of color nor one lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender person as I know it.”

This annoyed me for a few reasons.
First, I wasn’t clear on why Loren was singling out this particular image. It turns out she had a good reason: DC has been touting more diversity in their comics. This teaser is meant to show the direction DC is headed, however there is no diversity represented in the image. Therefore I now admit that she has a partially valid point… if it were DC’s intent to show the exact direction they are taking the company in.

According to Dan Didio, the image is symbolic. It represents upcoming and past events in the DC Universe. The positioning of the characters, the lighting, the objects and the characters portrayed were all carefully chosen for particular reasons which will be revealed as time goes on.
In the case of this image, DC meant no harm. I refuse to believe that it was a conscious, or even subconscious effort to exclude a group of people. Why on earth would they do that? Let’s not forget that DC is out to sell their product. Purposely excluding part of their target audience would be a grave error, and I’m sure it’s safe to assume they wouldn’t choose to lose money in this way.

The Minority Market

I totally agree that DC should have diverse comic book characters. Why? Because it makes sense to. There are black people, white people, asian people, mexican people, gay people, and handicapped people, etc. in comic books and in real life, therefore they should exist in comic books, as heroes and otherwise. However, they should not exist as marketing ploys.
People who complain about the DC teaser image are basically complaining that minorities are not represented in an advertisement. If DC included them in these images, and their presence didn’t make sense in the bigger symbolic picture, wouldn’t it just be a transparent attempt to appeal to that represented minority in order to sell comic books to that group?
The only reason a character, be it black, white, asian, gay, strait or otherwise should be included in an image or comic is if it makes sense to have them there… not simply to appeal to a particular group.

The main part of the afore quoted article that sparked my sarcastic response was this:

“Yes, there are several women in this shot, but…”

This got me thinking… where do you draw the line? If there was a black man in the picture, would the argument now become, “Yes, there are several women in the shot and a black guy, but where are the gay people?” or “Where are the Asians?”.
Where does the line get drawn? Conversely, if the shot contained no white males, would that be acceptable?

Unfortunately my negative reaction to other people’s negative reactions were construed to mean that I am a racist, which I am not.
The issue of diversity and racial harmony is not a light one. I do not believe it should be minimized or ignored. My original article was written in haste and with too much frustration. Rather than rationally stating my opinions, I reduced the argument to a sarcastic logic fallacy. For this I apologize to my readers.

To Recap

1. I’m not against diversity in comic books.
2. I believe that diversity in comic books should be used because it’s realistic, not as a money maker. In other words: if a comic book cover has 20 strait white males, or 20 black gay females so be it, as long as it coincides with the story-line.
3. My original post was rather harsh and sarcastic and failed to convey my true thoughts on the matter.

I was reading Civil War Front Line #9 tonight (did I mention I’m way behind on my Civil War reading?). There has been a great side story running in the back called the accused. In issue #8 Robbie “Speedball” Baldwin was transfered to the Negative Zone prison. In this issue, he is attacked by the aptly named Razor Fist (a character with two hook hands) and then this happens:

Um… OK. That’s disturbing enough as is, but the next panel makes the situation a bit more awkward:

Seriously?!

So the reality is, Razor Fist was using Speedball as a human shield and is bending his arms behind his back. However, Steve Lieber didn’t do the greatest job conveying this. I’m actually a little surprised that Joe Quesada let this one slip.

Newsarama posted an interview with Dan Didio last Friday about the strange DC teaser image that has so many people talking. It’s definitely a symbolic piece of art (which was obvious before being confirmed) and has many clues scattered within. The only real information that Dido gives out is that the picture reflects events yet to come, the Batman depicted is the current Batman, all the characters shown are from the current Earth, there is literal and symbolic meaning in the positioning and clothing of the heroes, and it is indeed the Atom’s arm in the ground.

This is a very interesting picture and on closer examination the art isn’t half as bad as I originally thought.